By Shikha Tailang

(AI generated translation of लाइफबॉय से नहाए क्या?) 

Sukriti — Corona and other times are gone! Now I am worried about how much will my deo cost this month. When this gentleman’s arrival is announced, I spray 100 mm of deo around me and sit down so that his smell reaches my nose as little as possible!

Me — Let us take Satvinder’s advice in this matter. He is intelligent and also gives good advice to the boss in technical matters.

Then we went to Satvinder. He is a technical assistant in a company. When we told him our problem, he said — Oye! Don’t worry. Now the matter is with me. I will think a little. Has he come yet?

Me — No!

Satvinder — Oye, then consider the problem solved. We will make a screen saver on his computer. It will be written on it — Did you bathe with Lifebuoy today? If it flashes on the screen every 10 minutes, it might light up his mind!

Everyone was delighted to hear this simple solution and we all convinced Satwinder to do this work. He put the new screen saver on Ranga Sahab’s system just 15 minutes before his arrival. As soon as Ranga ji arrived, he pressed the system button. The message “Did you bathe with Lifebuoy today?” flashed on his screen every 10 minutes but we were shocked to see that it made no difference to him and he remained engrossed in his work as before! We kept working with our noses closed!

The next day I couldn’t resist. He was lying in bed at home, waiting for the time to go to the office. I called him – Ranga Babuji!

Ranga said from the other side – Hun Hun!

Me – Ranga ji, I am very serious! At this time, don’t sing this song from the movie Rudaali – Dil Hun Hun Kare! The mind is worried! Hey! Get up and at least put a drop of water on yourself! Do you know what kind of stench enters our nose as soon as you come to the office and we feel like crying?

Ranga— Hey! I haven’t even woken up yet!

Me— At least open your eyes!

Ranga— Okay! If you say so, I will open my eyes.

Me— Okay! Now if your eyes have opened, then remember the scene in the office when you come. What havoc is created! Do you know people start fainting because of the stench coming from your body?

Ranga— Oh! That’s it!

Me— What else?

Ranga— Madam, you probably don’t know that I take a bath every day!

Me— Yes! Do you take a bath every day?

Ranga— I take a bath every day as per the scriptures.

Me— What is that?

Ranga— In our scriptures, there is a provision of eight types of baths for people. One of these baths is Hari bath! Now you know that the temperature of the city is less than 10 degrees. It is winter. In such a situation, I had read that if there is no arrangement for bathing in water, then the devotee should just take the name of Hari! Taking this name itself gives the same merit as bathing in the Ganges.

As soon as I revealed this secret of his, I started thinking. Then I scratched my head for a while and said – Ranga Babu! All that is fine! But we must stay clean! You can bathe in hot water in winter. Actually, by taking the name of Hari, you want to cover up your lazy nature. You know that Hari i.e. Lord Vishnu lives in the ocean itself. Lakshmi ji has emerged from the ocean itself. When the Lord himself lives in water by making his abode, then what kind of a devotee are you who avoids water? Why are you hating Lakshmi for avoiding bathing in his name?

Ranga – Okay Madam! I understood! From today onwards, I will come only after taking a bath! You people will never get a chance to complain whether I took a bath with Lifebuoy today?

(Fictional creation)